shhhh....

Today I heard a lot of silence. I don't usually handle silence very well because that usually means I'm alone and I'm just not a big fan of that. I was in the car today for about 5 hours...by myself, after being the car yesterday for about 5 hours...by myself. After just recently taking two road trips with friends this was somewhat difficult. After about hour 3 I was ready to let someone else drive...but there wasn't anyone. So the phone calls began. First the check in with my mom, then some voice messages, then...silence. It was kind of refreshing. I looked through my CD's and nothing seemed right (I know that is usually how most people feel after looking through my CD's, but I can always find something). So, I kept the silence.

I tend to fear silence. Today I didn't and it was nice. I don't think I require a lot of it, it's just not how I was made, but I did enjoy it today and I found it nice. A lot of me wants to now say the good Christian statement about how it turned into this amazing time of prayer and I really felt the presence of God, but that wasn't the case. I did my fair share of praying and it was nice to be alone for the first time in a long time, but I mainly just drove in silence. A lot can happen when I'm quiet. Maybe that's why it scares me. It doesn't seem to be something I crave but I didn't mind it. Maybe I'll embrace it more often. who can know.