Here I am, Lord

I've been traveling for the last week. Apart from a few life changing summer camps and incredibly powerful mission trips, this week will go down in the history book of my life as one of my favorites! I've been at the children's home for two years now. Earlier this summer the Lord showed me that this is not just a job to take a lightly, but that is my ministry. I began to see each day as life on the mission field...though days stuck behind a computer quickly began to become mundane. That all changed this past week. I spent everyday on one of our campuses spending time with our amazing children and talking with house parents. I love this picture. I took it during the sunrise from our Boys Ranch outside of Memphis. Its a little peice of heaven to me.

I've grown up going on mission trips to other states and other countries. This week I was once again reminded that our Lord is mighty and big and also loves His children here in Nashville and Tennessee. I heard stories from our children that moved me to tears. I heard house parents speak of answering the Lord's call in their lives to be full time missionaries for the Children's Home. I heard both of them talk about miracles happening in the lives of the children and how God is using this place to further His Kingdom and to spread His love. Its an exciting thing to be a part of. I'm humbled God would choose me and I'm excited about what great things He is doing in the lives of the children He has placed in our care.

Here is a snapshot of things I heard:
"If I hadn't of come to the children's home, I would be dead. We never had enough food so I figure I would have starved to death."

"I'm a houseparent because the Lord tells us to take of His children...the least of these."

"When I look into the eyes of these children I see the love of Christ. I see hope that can only come from an almightly Father who lavishes His on these dear children."

I was home for two days before I went back on the road. One of those nights I spent back at First Baptist for a retirement service for their minister of music. The choir sang a song that echoed everything I had heard the Lord calling me towards as I spent time with the children on our campuses. I don't know what my future holds. I don't know how long I will be at TBCH. I hope its a long time. I want to be useful and I want to help make a difference in the lives our children and help them see that there is a God who will always love them. The following is the song the choir sang that spoke to me as an affirmation that we are all called to be minsters of Christ wherever He sends us and to pray for His people. My prayer that is I will always remember I serve a God who hears his people cries and that I am willing to go wherever he sends me. If you have a minute today, I would appreciate it if you would stop and pray for the children at TBCH. They have lived hard lives and are in so much need of hope and joy.

I, the Lord of sea and sky,

I have heard my people cry.

All who dwell in dark and sin,
My hand will save.

Chorus

Here I am, Lord. Is it I, Lord?

I have heard you calling in the night.

I will go, Lord, if you lead me.

I will hold your people in my heart.

I, who made the stars of night,

I will make their darkness bright.

Who will bear my light to them?

Whom shall I send?

Chorus

I, the Lord of snow and rain,

I have borne my people’s pain.

I have wept for love of them.

They turn away.

Chorus

I will break their hearts of stone,

Give them hearts for love alone.

I will speak my words to them.

Whom shall I send?

Chorus

I, the Lord of wind and flame,

I will send the poor and lame.

I will set a feast for them.

My hand will save.

Chorus

Finest bread I will provide,'

Til their hearts be satisfied.

I will give my life to them.

Whom shall I send?

Here I am, Lord. Is it I, Lord?

I have heard you calling in the night.

I will go, Lord, if you lead me.

I will hold your people in my heart.

now your life can be complete!

1. I love that I have red hair.

2. Growing up, I was afraid to color my hair because I knew it would turn green just like Anne of Gables (my friends have sinced convienced me to highlight it...but that's as far as I'll go...I like the red!)

3. I love the colors red and orange together.

4. I think my life would make a great movie and I'm always thinking of which actors would play the different roles of the significant people in my life.

5. I love acting and think about getting back on the stage almost everyday.

6. The main reason I would want to be a teacher is so I could decorate my classroom!

7. I decorate for every season.

8. That's part of the reason I love my side job at Brentwood Stationers...I get at least a 4 month head start planning period on every season and holiday!

9. Orange is my favorite flavor...popsicle, candy, koolaid, etc.

10. I had some sort of metal in my mouth from 2nd grade - 10th grade. That's 9 years.

11. When I had braces I always thought it was fun to change the colors of my rubberbands each month. One October I chose to alternate orange and black (I like holidays...remember). After I saw those pictures I didn't choose colors much anymore. black was a bad choice.

12. I'm a follower of Jesus Christ.

13. This fact shapes everything about me.

14. Everyday I wake up and thank Jesus for loving me and spend the rest of the day trying to grasp what that really means.

15. I love the Lord and I love people.

16. I believe those two things should go together.

17. I was introduced to Kettle Corn popcorn in college and have not been able to eat any other kind since.

18. I don't understand when someone doesn't want to celebrate his or her birthday.

19. I think birthdays are very important and every one should be celebrated at least one day out of the year.

20. I have a heart for the youth of my community.

21. I miss working with the youth at my church and hope one day be able to do that again.

22. my most favorite part about my job is when I get to hang out with the kids and hear their stories.

23. I absolutely love musicals...so much so that I can't rank them in my top favorite movies because they have their own categories.

24. I really like sports.

25. I love to play basketball but I'm not very good at it.

26. Basketball and football are my favorite sports to watch.

27. I really enjoy running...especially in the spring and fall.

28. I prefer to run outside because I think I'm able to clear my head more.

29. I am in desperate need of a new study Bible but I'm very reluctant to part ways with the one that I've had for many years.

30. Each day I think I am becoming more and more a perfect balance of my mom and my grandmother. I feel good about that happy medium.

31. My mother is my hero and I thank God for her each day.

32. I am an aunt!

33. That makes me excited about being a mom some day...like being an aunt is some sort of training or something.

34. I got fired from my first non church related job in high school b/c I called in sick so I could go to church. Two days later they called to see if I wanted my job back...I didn't. I also got grounded for calling in sick when I wasn't. I was grounded from haning out with my church friends. Obviously I was quite the rebel in high school!

35. I am blessed to still have wonderful friendships that i've had since jr high and high school...I don't know what I would do without these friends.

36. I have a best friend who I've known for 19 years...I love that and I love her!...sometimes I miss the days where we would wear matching outfits and I would BEG my mom to let me call her to see if she wanted to go to the grocery store with us! Now I just call her to go to Target and we buy different clothes.

37. I got run over my junior year of high school two weeks before prom.

38. A year later, I went out with the boy that ran over me with his car...I guess I forgave him.

39. My top 3 favortie movies include The Natural, You've Got Mail, and Hook.

40. The only reason I would change jobs would be to plan big events.

41. I like to plan, organize, and make lists.

42. because of this, my real simple magazine subscription holds a special place in my heart.

43. I don't really like to read.

44. I tend to feel that if I'm going to read it should be my Bible or something Jesus related.

45. this has become quite the perdicament considering my new found love of Harry Potter.

46. I know more about Star Trek and Star Wars than I really ever admit. I blame this on my dad and my brother.

47. I also know more about comic books and the X-men then a girl really should...I blame this on them as well.

48. I have a dog and his name is Bauer.

49. I'm a big fan of the tv show 24.

50. I've loved Keiffer Sutherland ever since the Three Muskateers movie.

51. I feel it is important to document the goings on of my life...if not for theraputic purposes then for the sake of my children.

52. thus, I take LOTS of pictures.

53. and I journal most every day.

54. You would think these last three facts combined with my love for crafts would make me a shoe-in for scrapbooking...wrong. I've been working on the same scrapbook for the last 3 years. It's just not going to happen.

55. I love listening to soundtracks. My most favorite are The Natural, Dances with Wolves, Robin Hood Prince of Thieves, and You've Got Mail.

56. I work at a greeting card store but I rarely buy the cards.

57. ever since middle school i have LOVED making my own cards.

58. I'm very much a "people person."

59. I always said I would never live alone.

60. I live alone.

61. I absolutely love living alone...though I think I would feel differently if I didn't have Bauer.

62. I'm horribly afraid of the dark.

63. I get really involved with the movies I watch.

64. Sometimes this is annoying to people because I react out loud most of the time.

65. If my final destination is 5 hours or less I refuse to stop the car...unless I'm traveling with the pup.

66. My biggest fear is for Jimmy to not be at my wedding.

67. I love watching him love my mom.

68. I love to cook.

69. I'm working really hard to get all my place settings together so I can start having dinner parties.

70. I try to be home to watch the Wonder Years every night at 9.

71. If I could do anything on a Friday night it would be to get dressed up and go to the theater.

72. Mexican is by far my favorite "type" of food and I probably eat it at least every other day.

73. Potatoes are my favorite food.

74. Kevin James is my celebrity crush.

75. I take the word "friend" very seriously.

76. because of that, the majority of my friends are people I have known for more than 6 years.

77. I love that I have two very different pictures of "college life"

78. I hate that I feel like I didn't really go to college at either school I went to.

79. I love my jeep!

80. I go to Target at least once a week.

81. I prefer to wrap gifts instead of using gifts bag.

82. I'm very particular about how a gift is wrapped.

83. I'm not really sure I have a favorite color.

84. It used to be purple...my room was even purple...but I'm not sure its really my favorite.

85. One time in 8th grade I started really liking cows so I stopped eating beef. That resulted in me loosing a big portion of my iron intake. I had to miss my dress rehearsal for Little Women because I physically couldn't get out of bed. My parents took me to Arby's that night.

86. Arby's is one of my top 3 favorite "fast food" places.

87. I consider myself to be a sweet tea conisour.

88. Honey Mustard is hands down my condiment of choice and if a restaraunt doesn't have it, I rarely will eat there again.

89. I got in a wreck while skipping school in high school. It wasn't my fault and I didn't get in trouble.

90. I would love to be a mascot for a sports team.

91. I've been the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus.

92. Apparently I really like to dress up in costumes. I have an entire section of my closet that is strickly clothes for costume purposes.

93. I tend to keep the same CD in my CD player in my car for at least a month at a time. AND I usually only rotate between 5 CDs. Billy Joel and Paul Simon are in this rotation and sometimes they stay in there longer than a month.

94. At least half of the time I am in my car I keep the radio and music off. I really enjoy the quiet.

95. When the radio is on, half the time its on NPR.

96. I wish I was a better writer. For the sake of my job, and I just think it would be fun. I'm currently reading a book about finding your writing voice. I'm mainly reading it for the sake of my job, but also because I think it will be fun.

97. I absolutely LOVE to fly and there isn't a week that goes by that I don't regret not taking my interview with Southwest to be a flight attendent just to see what would have happened.

98. I love singing in a choir and I miss it terribly.

99. One of my most favorite concerts was the Gaither Christmas Concert. I love gospel music more than most people. (Though Billy Joel is my all time favorite concert, followed by a tie for second with Harry Connick Jr and James Taylor.)

100. A friend once told me that I don't humor anyone. Sometimes I like that, sometimes I don't. I used to be really harsh and blunt...I'm working on being kinder and more sympathetic.

dreams really do come true

I heard it was coming...I didn't believe it at first, but this week I saw it with my own eyes...even went in and made a purchase. My most favorite store ever has come to Nashville. If I owned a store it would be this one! I'll admit, I feel a little bit better about life these days knowing there is one near by! I would relate this feeling to your team winning the super bowl, or world cup, or christmas morning...its that big of a deal! If you have never been to Swoozies, I highly recommend going...at some point in your life you can benefit from something in the store. Even if you personally aren't that big of a fan of it...someone in your life will be and you can get them a present there!

so big

For those of you who have known Bauer from the time I brought him home, you have also known that I thought he wouldn't get much bigger than 20 lbs. HA HA HA!!!! I was sure wrong on that one! This past friday was Bauer's 1st Birthday! and he's weighing in just under 35 lbs!!! He's just the cutest little chunk of love! From people who go weeks without seeing to those who see him regularly, the first words out of anyone's mouth seem to be, "He's gotten so big!" He has gotten big, but hopefully now that he's a big boy the growing will calm down. Here are some pictures of Bauer with his birthday presents!!! He LOVED them!

he's so ready for the first day of school!!

he rocked out on his new guitar all night!

bauer loves to show off his grill!

oh...family time...

This past weekend I went to Louisiana to celebrate my Granpa's 90th birthday. It's not everyday you get to turn 90 so it was quite the celebration. All my cousins came in, my dad, ...and....Stuart and Sara and BABY SEAN!!!! That by far was the highlight of the weekend. Look how adorable he is!!!

Here are the two most favortie quotes of the weekend...welcome to north Louisiana by the way! Where apparently the only thing to discuss is why Emily isn't married...sweet!

Granny: That's a pretty ring you have there (grabbing my left hand and noticing the ring on my middle finger)
Emily: Thanks Granny!
Granny: Now, when am I going to see an important ring on this very important finger? (still holding my left hand and grabbing my ring finger)
Emily: Ummm, not today.
Granny: Well you know all these men would be flirting with you...but their your cousins!
Emily: Good thing they are!

Family Friend: You are beautiful!
Emily: Thank you!
Family Friend: You know they are saying that we are seeing less and less red heads because no one is marrying red heads...
Emily: (holding up left hand) apparently not!
- to this lady's credit she went on to say how red heads aren't marrying red heads so there are fewer and fewer...however, I still thought it was funny!

blondes ain't got nothin' on me

so we all know the saying, "Blondes have more fun!" however, I'm pretty sure red heads are a close second...look at these pictures of people putting on the "emily wig" and you be the judge!

someone older and wiser

I feel like getting older is a gradual process. With the exception of my 16th birthday when I instnatly got to start driving by myself, I feel the aging part of birthdays is a bit anti-climatic. Don't get me wrong, I do LOVE birthdays and will probably always make a big deal out of everyone's and stand by my belief that everyone deserves to be celebrated at least one day of the year. However the feeling older part doesn't really come in one moment on that day...at least it hasn't seemed that way for me.

with 25 being a quater of a century it's a kind of mile marker in ones life. Everyone keeps asking me how I'm doing, if I feel older and wiser and sooo much more closer to 30. Its not so much that I'm ready to be older, but I'm really excited about 25. We'll see if I become wiser this year...

here are some pictures on how I turned 25! Thank you to those who helped me celebrate! The party theme was ME! selfish I know...but it turned out to be really funny. I challeneged folks to dress up like me.

anna dressed up like me strickly by accident...gotta love target

Scott on the other hand did an amazing job of replecating 4th grade emily - what you can't see is that these are overall shorts, with bright blue socks and high tops...and he has a ribbon in his hair! AMAZING!

it was jason and jeremy's birthday as well...so they sang to all three of us!

I feel like 25 is off to a great start...stay tuned...more fun to come I'm sure...oh, more older and totally wiser fun at that!

i'm a pepper, you're a pepper

I don't remember not liking Dr. Pepper. Its by far my carbinated beverage of choice.

So I moved into my new place, right? Well it happens to be right across the street from target. ugh! I have to cut back on my spending and I move closer to my addiction...not good. But...I shall overcome. Anyway...last night I had a girls night with two friends that consisted of cold stone and a trip to target. At cold stone I didn't really feel like ice cream and wanted some sort of slushy/smoothie type thing. Well I got this strawberry/lemon smoothie and it was good...but didn't do the trick. We walk around target (Please note: for the record I did not buy anything!!!) and we get in the check out line and I say, "I really just want an icee!" Kera, the wise one of the bunch says, "Well there they are, you should just get one." Little did I know my life was about to change.

I looked over towards the icees and there it was. I swear there was a special light from heaven shining on it. - now let me interrupt this story by telling you that I'm not one to buy treats at target. I heard one of my friends mention something about coke and popcorn for real cheap at target and that it could be my new late night snack in my place b/c I could just walk there, but I didn't really listen b/c I had always been so focused on other things in target that when I go in, I just don't even look towards the pizza hut/pretzel/popcorn/icee goodness - So there it was, Dr. Pepper Icees!!!! I had no idea! Had I been missing this all along??? I almost screamed but I didn't ...emily might have screamed for me so it was ok. Needless to say I got right over there in that line and got myself a large Dr. Pepper Icee! The nice lady asked if I wanted my free popcorn...even better! So its true. You can get a large icee as well as popcorn for less than $2 at target. My life is changed...definatly for the better.

ps they also have Jolly Rancher Watermelon icees...kera had her life changed as well.

oh, country music

Growing up I was very quick to say that I did not like country music. I'm pretty sure I would even use the word "hate" occasionally. It wasn't until I went away to college that I discovered I do like most country music. I think initially I felt like I owed it to Nashville, my hometown, to stick up for country music when I moved away. I began to appreciate the old country and "the legends" and I started really like some of the new stuff...you know the dixie chicks, faith hill, tim mcgraw. I think I always liked Vince Gill (thanks to the Gentry's and me having to watch CMT everymorning before the bus came) and Garth Brooks. But slowly I started keeping the radio on country stations more and more.

Which brings us to today. I currently keep a steady rotation between soft rock (92.9), new indie music (lightning 100), NPR, and my country station of choice 97.9 wsix - mainly b/c of Jerry House in the mornings! So I got to lunch today and its on 97.9 from this morning and this song comes on that I haven't heard before...but the voices are very familiar. I come to the conclusion that it is Tim and Faith, however, the lyrics were HORRIBLE!

It was an obvious love song about two people needing the other person which is sweet and all but then chorus started off with:
"I need you like a needle needs a vain..."
for whatever reason that was the least romantic comparison I would have thought to have made and just thought it was really funny. It went on to say that he also needed her, "like the Father and Son need the Holy Ghost..." Seriously?? they were serious.

I think one of the reasons I have a heard time always liking country music is because the lyrics are so ... I don't know, blatent...which I guess is why some people like it b/c it is rarely sugar coated but I just thought it was really funny. I don't I'll want my husband to ever want me like needle wants a vein...but I guess it works for some folks!

speaking of funny lyrics...i do LOVE the new Brad Paisley song, "TICKS" incredibly clever!

feels like home

I can't remember the last time I was this excited! Maybe when my parents surprised me with a puppet stage, or the night I brought Bauer home, either way, I'm pretty excited about my new place to live! Is that silly? I have always said that I would never live by myself. It just sounded horrible to me. I love people so much that to think about coming home to a place where no one else lives was just sad. However, this past spring brought to me a place where I would entertain the thought of living by myself and it would make me really happy. So...I did it! I bit nervous at first, but I am absolutely loving it! It's really funny to me how moving into a new place gives you this feeling of completely being able to start over. It's not new year's, but here are my new house resolutions:

1. Make my bed everyday (we are on day 4 and all things are looking good!)
2. Keep fresh flowers in the room! (I'm not sure this will last, but they make me happy and look pretty and I would love to keep up this habit!)
3. Keep clothes (and especially socks...bauer!) off the floor at all times. - now, techincally not all my close are out of bags yet so I've yet to do this one, but once I get it done I'm hoping to keep it done.
4. I really want to try and be home at least 3 nights a week. I really doubt this will happen but I'm starting to kind of enjoy "emily" time - which is a super shock to me! - and its just so great to love where I live!

I've heard lots of things while being at the new place! I've heard most my neighbors stories which are good ones and I'm excited to have a new community to be involved in. I heard my dog bark A LOT! Who knew the little brat would be such a good guard dog?! I've also heard people tell me they like the place...maybe they are lying, but either way its been great to be able to have people over again and spend time with friends.

Speaking of friends...I could not have made the move without some wonderful folks! They made it such an easy and enjoyable move and made the first few nights full of fun!

humbled by prayer

Now I'll be honest and say I'm not one of those people who hates for all the attention to be on them...I don't mind it, however, when someone offers to pray for me, pray over me, while I'm standing there I suddenly seem to not want that attention. I never really knew why that was because if you should welcome any kind of attention it should be that of someone praying for you, right?

I leave Friday to go back to Moldova. This will be my third time to go and I couldn't be more ready. I know the kids. I know the routine. I know my God is great and is ready to work! Why am I still nervous and unsure? I've done a bit more behind the scenes, pre-trip work this year which I think is adding to my stress but I've come to appreciate my nerves. I figure if I think I got it all under control then that doesn't leave much room for the Lord to work, right? I'm able to find peace and exercise my faith in the midst of uncertainty of schedules, passports, kids, etc. My God is with me and He is mighty save (so says Zephaniah). I never feel more myself and who God is creating me to be than when I am with these kids in Moldova.

So why do I get all weird when people want to pray for me? I've come to find out that its because I know I so desperately need it that it puts me in a very vulnerable position. I know God has called me to go on this trip...that means there is no way I can do it by myself. I need the prayers of His people. Its very humbling to hear someone pray over me and know that I need those prayers to do His work. Its very humbling and I very much appreciate the prayers I've heard for me, my team, the children we will work with, and the country of Moldova this week. Thank you!

kids kamp kraziness

Tonight is the last night of Cool Springs Kids Kamp 2007 (that's the fancy name for what my church calls their Vacation Bible School). Though these past few weeks have been some of the most stressful as I've tried to prepare myself, my church, and the kids for this week I have to say I'm kind of saved its almost over. That's a rather new mindset about it though.

Last week, and even up until Sunday friends and family would ask how I was and if I felt prepared or stressed or ready, etc. My answer was always something to the extent of, "I'd really like to wake up and it be August!" I was ready for Kids Kamp to be over. I was ready to be back from Moldova. I was ready to move out and move in somewhere and be settled. However, today, I'm not ready. I'm not ready for this week to be over. Tuesday night we had several kids say they were ready to accept Christ! Some went home and were able to sit with their parents and ask questions and pray to accept Christ into their lives. Others came back Wednesday ready to pray with their teachers! Though I can't quite remember a time I have been this stressed, this busy, this over-comitted, and this out of touch with my friends, its all worth it because these kids lives are forever changed! It's exciting to be a part of!

This is why I do all that I do. It's why I decided to help with Kids Kamp. It's why I can't not go back to Moldova. It's why I work for organization that changes the lives of children on a daily basis. I love Jesus and I long for others to love Him as well. I have no doubt I will wake up tomorrow morning and be joyful...and not just because the kids kamp stress is over, but because my God is alive and He is growing His kingdom and reaching out to His children!

So...to all my friends who I've not been able to have real converstaions with in weeks...I'm sorry, but I'm almost back and ready for action. Thank you for understanding and to most of you, thank you for making this week a great one for the kids! Once tonight is over and I'm done making goal posts and planning bible studies and freaking out about who will teach cheerleading...I'm ready to have friends again!...well for two weeks, until I go to Moldova!

a favorite

If you were to ask me, "Emily, what's your favorite restaurant?" Anyone who knows me at all knows that I will say...well true, Las Palmas is near and dear to my heart but if we are going for all time favorite, then I would say...ok, well Baja Burrito would come before Las Palmas, but still if we are going for all time favorite and money isn't an option...YES! The Cheesecake Factory. The obsession started early on really. You would think that a love of cheesecake compelled me to enjoy this place so much when actually it was the other way around. A love of the Factory taught me to appreciate the amazing dessert that is the cheesecake. Its the whole experience there that I love. The atmosphere, the book of a menu, the fabulous food, and of course...the cheesecake.

Now, what many of you don't know is that there is a place I love just as much. I know what you are thinking...that its not possible. It is though. There is a place that I LOVE, but I never really talk about it. One reason is most people haven't heard of it so its just easier to say, "the Cheesecake Factory!" and then whoever asked the question will usually responded with, "Oh yeah, I went to one of those in Chicago!" or "Yes! That's a great choice, however you know I've never had the cheesecake. I'm always too full!" See, not only is the cheesecake Factory a great place to eat, but a fabulous conversation starter as well. I'm not sure other reasons why I don't mention it. I guess b/c I've never been there with friends, I don't know. anyway...

So today I heard that I get to plan the menu for a lunch that we are doing at work and it is coming from Mere Bulles, my favorite restaurant. I've only been there for work events and meetings but I absolutely love it. Its in an old plantation home in Brentwood. Its beautiful, especially at Christmas. I love everything about it. The fact that the waiters remember repeat customers, the atmosphere, the art work on the walls, the patio when its nice outside, the fact you can reserve to eat in the Library, but most importantly the She Crab bisque soup. It is the most amazing soup and it is the main reason I love this place so much. I've also never had anything twice on the menu and I've yet to be disappointed. From Mahi-Mahi Sandwiches to Rib Rolls or various salads...gosh, its all so good!

So, the truth comes out. My true favorite. If you've never been I encourage you to go...and you can take me if you want!

Auntie Em!

so my sister-in-law just had a baby...that makes me an aunt...and my brother a father! It's crazy! Sean Michael Lamkin was born on Saturday, May 19, 2007 at 12:30pm! They are home and everyone is doing well! I can't wait to meet the little guy...I'm not sure when that can happen but hopefully soon!

seriously??!!!?

so...though my dog is cute... as you can see for yourself, i'm not sure he's the smartest. Granted, he can learn tricks and he's learned the names of most of his toys, and he can act like a cat with the best of them however, the commen sense factor may not be all there.

Some of you may remember my blog after Valentine's Day recalling the account of when Bauer decided to consume and entire toy. 20 stitches later...we were fine. You would have thought that would teach him not to eat cloth...it didn't. Don't worry.

Yesterday I got back from my trip to Chattanooga and picked Bauer up from my parent's house (Gran and Pop as they like to be called). He was really tired and lazy when we got home. I figured this was because he had been playing outside for two days and was worn out. This morning he woke me up at 5am throwing up. I wasn't all that concerned...it was just some grass and such, nothing to be worried about...again, he had been playing outside for two days and bauer tends to run with his mouth open and eat everything that comes in his way so I assumed the grass intake was higher than normal causing his stomach to be upset. We continue on with our morning routine...breakfast, outside, I take a shower, start getting ready, etc. Usually while I get ready Bauer camps out under my bed. That's where he was this morning when I hear him start hacking something up. I take a quick glance under the bed and it looks like bauer is just chewing on a toy. I look a bit closer...not a toy, a pair of underwear...THAT HE JUST THREW UP! My dumb dog swallowed a pair of underwear whole and then threw it up this morning. It was disgusting! HILARIOUS! but really gross. Seriously bauer, stop eating cloth!

choose your own adventure

The first part of this week I spent at that Chattanooga campus of the Children's Homes. Monday night was the retirement dinner for our East Region Vice President. It was a lovely dinner and I was touched as I heard friends and collegues get up and say such nice things about this man. At the end, Dr. Segrest got up and said a few words. He began to talk about being a pastor, a sunday school teacher, a trustee for the Children's Homes, and finally a RVP for us. He then thanked his wife for standing beside him through all thier years of adventure in ministry.

I liked that...adventure in ministry. I think its true. I found myself longing to be able to tell stories from my own adventures in ministry. I continued to think about that the rest of the night, and still the next morning during the board meeting...and still on my way home.

As christians we are always in ministry. Everything we do. Too often I forget that. Even working for a christian organization I forget that what I do is ministry. When I'm not working at the Children's Home...I'm still doing ministry. I got really excited when I began to think of it that way! What an adventure our lives can be!

I'm not sure I've done the best job of being excited about my job...I am. I love it and I love the work God allows me to do for these precious children! What children you ask? These absolutely adorable ones! (this is what I did monday...it was a blast!)

happy birthday!

so I've heard "Happy Birthday!" A lot lately. I had two friends have birthdays back to back this past weekend.

I was excited that they both had parties. Someone once asked me when I think I'll get too old to have a birthday party. I'm not quite sure that will ever happen. It could possibly have something to do with my previous blog...however my mom hasn't had birthday parties for herself since I can remember so I think we might differon this topic. I realize, I'm still really young to make a comment like "I will never not have a birthday party." I realize I could one day have kids and a family and they would take priority over my birthday but I just love birthdays so much. My mom always made a big deal about our birthdays so naturally I see them as highly important.

I love the fact that everyone has their own special day for themselves! You should be celebrated! I never understand why people don't like their birthday or don't like getting older. There is so much excitement in starting a new year. Maybe I'm just really cheesy and like excuses to have parties...but honestly I think I genuinely love the concept of celebrating someone! Is that wierd? maybe. What's also weird is that I've had 24 bithday parties and only repeated a theme once. CRAZY! Wonder what the big 2-5 theme will be? any suggestions???

as a side note: I realize I've talked about my mom a bit in these last two blogs. I think that may have to do with the fact that it is Mother's Day on Sunday. At the Children's Home we get 25% of our operating budget from the Mother's Day Offering...which is my responsiblity. So this is my plug for you to give! Honor or remember the special women in your life by giving to the Tennessee Baptist Children's Homes. Your gift helps a child in need recieve the love and care they deserve!!!

...and that's what Easter is all about.

When you meet my mother I have a feeling you begin to understand me in a whole new way. I think that in a way, that's true for most people. Meeting someone's parents allows you to understand why that person is the way they are a little better. However, I think my resemblance to my mother goes a bit deeper than most. That may have to do with the fact that my brother's resemblance to my father goes a whole lot deeper than most (mainly b/c they didn't spend everyday together so to have the same voice inflection, laugh, mannerisms, and interests is amazing). Luckily for me, most days I really like my mom so I don't mind being like her in a lot of ways.

For as long as I can remember, we have always had people over for holidays. Not just family but friends and neighbors. I'm not sure if this is because we aren't real sure what will happen if its just the family so we invite others over to be buffers or if it really is the heart beat of my mother to reach out and always minister when the opportunity to presents itself. I'm sure there is some of both, but i believe more of the latter. My mom genuinely loves people. I've always known this about her but I think this Easter it became more real.

Easter Sunday was coming up and mom asked if I had any friends in town who wouldn't get to go home and be with thier families. I was certain I did so I told her I would get back to her. Like I said earlier, we've always had people over for Easter lunch, thanksgiving dinner, etc. Sometimes its been neighbors, friends from church who have lost loved ones...once I went to college in town it quickly turned into me having friends over who couldn't go home and see thier own parents. So, I emailed a few friends to see if folks were staying here or going home. I began to get a lot of responses about friends that would love to come over. I started getting nervous b/c I could tell right away this wouldn't be the same gathering of a few friends like there had been in years past. I got nervous that my mom would get upset because of all the people coming over. I told her my concern and she looked at me and said, "Oh, that's fine. That's what Easter is all about!" Meaning, what a better time than resurrection Sunday to fellowship with loved ones.

The more I think about it, I think that's what life is all about ultimately. Yes, Easter and Christmas and Thanksgiving are all great times to spend with family and friends, but I guess this is maybe something my mother has enstilled in my heart. A love for people. Maybe this is why I throw so many parties and always want to have people over. That's what life is all about, right? We are called to have life and to have it abundently. I guess that looks different for everyone. But to me, thanks to my mom, that looks like having lots of friends over for good food!

All that to say, I like my mom. I like the ways that I'm like her. I'm thankful for her and Jimmy and that they love my friends just as much as I do. And that they love when 17 of them come over for Easter Lunch! I hope each of you had a great Easter...wether it was spent with family or friends or a mixture. After all, that's what Easter is all about. And if that doesn't sound like a line from Charlie Brown then I'm not sure what does!

me? entranced by a book?

I don't usually blog on anything all that serious...mainly because I'd prefer to actually discuss "serious" things with actual people, not just put it out there for whoever to stumble upon. However, I've read some things lately that have provoked my mind in a way it hasn't been in a long time.

I started reading this book (I know, shocker #1). The thing is, I can't put it down (shocker #2). I've never been a reader. I'm not really sure why. Maybe because I was forced to go in so many bookstores as a child with my dad and brother that I was turned off at an early age. Maybe its because I just simply enjoy conversation more than reading words. Maybe its because I fall asleep within the first paragraph usually...who can know really. However, I have recently began reading Girl Meets God, by Lauren Winner. Its about a girl who became an Orthodox Jew convert and then later converts to Christianity. I'm fascinated by her thoughts. I fascinated by how smart she sounds when she writes, which leads me to think she is actually smart when she doesn't write as well. It makes me want to write and want to think deeply about life and God and my faith. It makes me want to get coffee and sit and read all day on a rainy saturday - granted I don't like coffee and I don't like to read.

Here's a quote that I processed for long time last time. It just makes me think...not in a "gosh, this girls got it all figured out" kind of way, but in a "I really want to think about God" kind of way...maybe that doesn't make sense, its ok.

"Here is the thing about God. He is so big and so perfect that we can't really understand Him. We can't possess Him, or apprehend Him. Moses leanred this when he climbed up Mount Sinai and saw that the radiance of God's face would burn him up should he gaze upon it directly. But God so wants to be in relationship with us that He makes himself small, smaller than He really is, smaller and more humble that his infinite, perfect self, so that we might be ablt to get to Him, a little bit."

She goes on to talk about God shrinking Himself down into "manger finiteness" and then quotes another author who says, "For people with bodies, important things like love have to be embodied. That's all. God had to be embodied, or else poeple with bodies would never in a trillion years understand about love."

now maybe none of this makes you think. maybe it makes you think, "wow em, you're really simple minded if this is what makes you think...I thought about this years ago." which is fine. Either way, I encourage you to think...about life, about God, your faith. Maybe it will inspire you to meet with friends and discuss what you think about those things. Maybe you too will long for a rainy saturday to sit in a coffee shop and read even when you too don't like coffee and don't like to read.

top chef

Today I heard a girl who worked at a gocery store say to a customer, "I think I'm going to really enjoy grocery shopping when I get older." I thought it was really funny at first. She was genuinely excited to grow up and go shop for groceries. As I continued shopping around the store I kept thinking about that and would smile. It kind of made me happy that someone felt that. I don't know if I would ever think to say that I like shopping for groceries...but I think maybe I might. I don't do it all that often and when I do its usually for parties but I've recently found out I love trying to new recipies and cooking meals. By the end of my visit to the store I found myself hoping that was something I said when I was younger and thinking that now that I am older, I am excited about it...most days. I left smiling. Who wants dinner?

the piano man

Last night I had the great privilage to hear Billy Joel in concert. It was a fantastic show.

For those of you who read...who, I'm not really sure who you are, which is fine, but if you are reading this and you aren't quite sure what kind of music I like...I like Billy Joel kind of music. Good grief, he's so good! He would start to play a song, and I would completely forget that there words to it eventually because I found myself completely satisfied just listening to him play the piano. But then he would start to sing and it just got even better! Every song is a good one. He played a few that he said he doesn't ever play and so there was one I had never heard before, but still just as good and entertianing and enjoyable as the ones I've grown up listening to. I think he's such a talented musician! He played some older songs last night that were released well before I was even a thought in anyone's mind and it made me wish I would have been able to grow up listening to him when all those songs first came out. You know, probably the same feeling my kids will have when they hear NSync...right?! I'm just kidding. Anyway, the concert was fabulous and I thrilled I got to go...and for free! If you haven't spent quality time listening to Mr. Joel, and by quality time I meant at least two months out of the year, I would highly encourage you to start. Start anywhere, with any song. Sure I have my favorites...but they are all great!

as a side note...here's an update on my dog. remember? he's the one that decided to eat and entire toy. so...20 stitches later he's doing alright. He'll get his stitches out next week and after that should be back to normal. I feel like this may not be the last time this happens...but hopefully he won't do it again for awhile. Doggy surgery is not what my budget wanted to happen!

Today I heard the doctor talk about x-rays. Not for me...for my dog. Poor little Bauer. So early last week he decided that would be best if he ate his toy...like the whole thing. It was a small toy, but probably a dumb idea. Thinking I would be visiting the emergency pet clinic that night, I was surprised when everything was fine. Day 2...fine, 3, 4, and so on...fine, he was fine. Day 8 however, that's a different story.


Yesterday was Day 8. Happy Valentine's Day to me...and poor Bauer. I was having a few friends over for a RED and BLACK party, thus rushing around trying to clean, do my makeup, and plate the food all at the same time. I notice something by the couch. It happenend...he finally got sick of having an entire toy in his belly and decided he should probably throw it up. The entire toy...there it sat, 5 minutes before people arrive. Needless to say, Bauer was a bit out of the rest of the night. He's now at the vet and I'm sure will be just fine in no time! silly pup!

The party was able to go on as planned! Everyone looked so fun in their RED and BLACK! gosh I love holidays...and my friends! Here are some fun pictures to get your mind away from thinking about my sick dog!

with a grateful prayer and a thankful heart

last week I heard my pastor reflect on things that have happened over the past year. One thing he mention was a close friend of my dying. this morning I heard my boss give a devotional on heaven and those we loved that are already there. he spoke on Hebrews 12:1. This great cloud of witnesses that we have. I found it encouraging as I was reminded that those who were interested and genuinely concerned with my life here on earth are just as much concerned now that they are in heaven.

i've missed my friend a lot over the past month or two. i'm not really sure why, I just know that i could really used her wisdom, encouragement, and her "this is how I got through it" stories. i'm so grateful for the things I learned from her. i'm glad to know she's in my cloud of witnesses.

well...last week was thanksgiving. i was so very thankful. thankful for great time with friends and family. new neighbors, old friends. thankful for the break from work. i love the holidays and the smile it brings to so many peoples faces and hearts. my mom and I do the big shopping the day after, we get up early and hit a few stores...nothing major. I really just enjoy the crowds and being out with all the shoppers. its just fun!

the cutest little dreamer ever

today I heard bauer start dreaming. it might be one of the cutest things I've heard in a long time! here he is....how cute is he???!!!

a lot to live up to....

so in about a week i will be hearing the cutest little whines and bark ever heard. I will have a new edition to my life...and this is him...



His name is bauer. This is him at 5 weeks old. I will get him at 7 weeks. I couldn't be more excited. I've wanted a dog for so long and I'm so thankful to my roommate for letting me get one.

Now, Bauer...like Jack Bauer, from 24. I know that's places a lot of pressure on this little guy to save the world from bombs, viruses, terrorist, Kim Bauer, etc. but I think he can do it. I went to pick him out last weekend and out of all 4 puppies he was the only one to give his best effort to either play with me or try and escape out the back door. He didn't pass either with flying colors but he's only a month old...he will learn in time. CTU training will begin immediately upon his arrival to my apartment. Now its just a matter of convincing my roommate to get a little friend name Almeida for him to take over the world with!

shhhh....

Today I heard a lot of silence. I don't usually handle silence very well because that usually means I'm alone and I'm just not a big fan of that. I was in the car today for about 5 hours...by myself, after being the car yesterday for about 5 hours...by myself. After just recently taking two road trips with friends this was somewhat difficult. After about hour 3 I was ready to let someone else drive...but there wasn't anyone. So the phone calls began. First the check in with my mom, then some voice messages, then...silence. It was kind of refreshing. I looked through my CD's and nothing seemed right (I know that is usually how most people feel after looking through my CD's, but I can always find something). So, I kept the silence.

I tend to fear silence. Today I didn't and it was nice. I don't think I require a lot of it, it's just not how I was made, but I did enjoy it today and I found it nice. A lot of me wants to now say the good Christian statement about how it turned into this amazing time of prayer and I really felt the presence of God, but that wasn't the case. I did my fair share of praying and it was nice to be alone for the first time in a long time, but I mainly just drove in silence. A lot can happen when I'm quiet. Maybe that's why it scares me. It doesn't seem to be something I crave but I didn't mind it. Maybe I'll embrace it more often. who can know.

a reacurring thought

Today I heard a class of about 20 3rd graders say, "Thank you, Emily." It might have been the cutest thing I've heard in a long time.

My mom has been substituting full time for a teacher that is on maternity leave until October. She wanted me to come meet her class and teach them some different lettering things that they could use on the project they were working on.

Now, I'm around kids a good bit. I have done and continue to do my fair share of babysitting. I've worked with youth for a while. I'm currently teaching the kindergarten class on Sunday mornings. I'm beginning to learn which age groups I'm better at than others. I used to see "kids" as a collective group and you are either good with kids or you aren't. I'm quickly learning that you can be great with a 2 year old and horrible with a 4 year old (that's me). Or you can be great with a 8th grader and not so great with a 4th grader. I can make the general statement that I love kids because I truely do. However when it comes to actually teaching them things....I think I love them once they have had a year of school and can write. That means first grade and up. I LOVE these kids. That's what I've learned.

I've tossed back and forth the idea of being a teacher. I always knew that's what I wanted to do. Always. I'm curious as to why I didn't pursue that in college. I keep saying I'll go back to school so I can teach when I pay off my loans. I'm not sure how I feel about that.

Here's my question...How do you plan the future you have no control over? If there are things you know you want to do and you know God has gifted you in a way to be good at them, how long do you wait until you use those strengths and pursue those dreams? I love my job right now but I know I would love teaching as well. I know there is an element of trust. I also feel like there's an element of action on my part as well. I'm curious to see where God guides me over these next few as I continue to learn more about who He is creating me to be.

what are your passions and dreams? Are you pursing them? Are you somewhere else for the time being? I'm just curious as to others ways of handling this part of life. The real world, I guess.

christian chicken

This morning I heard the nice lady at chickfila say, "Mam, our systems are down so all we can offer you is a beverage of your choice and a chicken biscuit." Ummm...this made for quite possibly the best morning in awhile. Because of some recent moving expenses and furniture purchases money has been tight to say the least. I have done good and had not spent money on food since last Friday. For those of you who know me well, which I'm assuming if you read this blog then you probably do, know that I love to go out to eat. Meet a friend for lunch...grab dinner with gang, etc. So I've been good for about a week, I've managed to either eat dinner with the parents, cook dinner at home, and bring my lunch to work. The other night I found an old coupon for chickfila.

As I drove to work this morning, after having left on time...which is a big accomplishment for me, I started pondering getting something for breakfast. My immidiate thought was, "Em, you don't have any money." Then I remembered the coupon and how good I had been all week. I weighed the pros and cons as I neared the stoplight at Chickfila. I decided to go in. Great was my reward! I ended up getting breakfast and it was for free! I didn't have to spend any money!!!! Needless to say...it's going to be a great Thursday!

Now...I don't say all that just for you all to be jealous of my luckiness in getting free chickfila but to comend chickfila for always doing their best to please the costumer. I wrote a paper on a local chickfila store in college and in doing that read Truitt Cathy's book. It's a good read for you business folk out there. Anyway, whatever the small things are that make your days great...I wish them on you today! It's Thursday...that means tomorrow is Friday...and that's the freakin weekend baby! Be happy!!!

a true retreat

This weekend I heard the ocean. It was fantastic! 12 of us from church went on a retreat this weekend and it was truly that. None of this busiest weekend ever crap where your every minute is planned with times to eat, activities to participate in, structed games and discussions....we had no agenda. We wanted to take naps...we did it. We wanted to spend the entire day on the beach...we did it. We wanted to try our best to build a sand castle...we did it. It had been a while since I had taken a true vacation where I come back feeling fully rested. It was much needed and I am so very thankful for it. I got to meet some new folks and spend time with those I love. God is great and all His creations are beautiful works of art. I appreciate trees and the mountains but there is something about the vastness of the oceans that commands you to stand in awe and praise God for all things. He is is soverign and our God most certianly reigns. I'm ready to go back to the beach!!!


by far...the best quote of the weekend would be from my beloved roommate, "Jesus made making out...it's totally biblical."